"I’m in for work at 6.30am and one of the last to leave. I don’t want to go home. We have beds at the training ground and I go home sometimes and say to my wife: 'Do you know something, I didn’t want to leave work today!' It’s not a slight on my wife. It’s just a great position to be in when you love your job so much." - Phil Neville talks about his marvellous life since rejoining Manchester United in the summer, this time as a coach working under David Moyes. Let's hope United don't start actually playing well - poor old Phil might just explode with pleasure.
"I live for my job. Football is my life. If you're not doing that, then you feel you are not doing what you're supposed to. I live my life the way I should do and when I'm fit, like I am now, I feel incredibly strong." - Manchester City captain Vincent Kompany, another man who really, really likes his job.
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Meet Mr Marmite
"Neil is like Marmite and fans either love him or hate him, but he knows the Championship inside out and so will be mentioned for jobs in the division." - Peter Beagrie's verdict on Neil Warnock, who was shortlisted for the Sheffield Wednesday managers' job despite lifelong links to their arch-rivals Sheffield United.
"I'd **** ‘em up so badly. Then I’d retire to Cornwall and spend the rest of my life laughing my fucking head off." - Warnock, talking to FourFourTwo magazine several years ago about what he'd do if he ever became Sheffield Wednesday manager.
"I did speak to Milan Mandaric last night and I think we both realised then that it wasn't going to be. When Milan phoned me originally I did tell him it would be pretty much impossible to manage Sheffield Wednesday when I'm a Blade, but he asked me to have time to think about it. He wanted me to try and keep them up. He has tried to bring me in as his manager about four times over the last 20 years so I have got a lot of respect for him." Warnock again, on Friday, ruling himself out of the job despite a plea from Wednesday owner Milan Mandaric. Threats from lifelong Owls fans to abandon the club should Warnock get the job are thought to have played a big part in the decision…
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Romantic of the Week
"It really was love at first sight, I'd never felt anything like it before. We were at a party and I hadn't even spoken to him all night. I didn't know what to do or if he was gay at first. I made the first move, I typed 'call me' in his notes with a smiley face on this phone and the next day he texted… He makes me feel safe and happy, right now I couldn't be happier. I'd never felt the feeling of love, it happened so quickly, I was completely overwhelmed by it to the point I can't get him out of my head all the time. I've never had it before where I love someone and they love me just as much." - Tom Daley talks about the first time he met his boyfriend, the Oscar-winning screenwriter Dustin Lance Black.
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Vile "jokers" of the Week
"I hope they're better pilots than they are in Scotland." - Recently-retired Swedish golf star Helen Alfredsson on Sky Sports golf commentary as a pilot flew over the course at the Dubai Ladies Masters. She later apologised and said she was "devastated" over her "inappropriate" remark.
"Helicopter crashes into Scottish pub.....Locals report no beer was spilt." - Australia's former US PGA Championship winner Steve Elkington on Twitter. The Tweet was later deleted with Elkington posting an apology of sorts. Next time someone tries to tell you that it's footballers who are the most distasteful idiots in the world of sport, point them towards these two horrendous human beings from the supposedly genteel and respectable game of golf.
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Fantasist of the Week
"I think I could be one of the fastest sprinters in British history… I genuinely think I can cause an upset" - Britain's Olympic gold medal-winning long jumper Greg Rutherford talks up his chances of turning to the 100m instead. All long jumpers have to be fast sprinters, of course, but Rutherford is making fans sicker than ever of his consistent ability to talk himself up married to a decidedly inconsistent ability to back up his words in competition, when it actually counts.
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Farewell to a true legend
"Sport has the power to change the world. It has the power to inspire. It has the power to unite people in a way that little else does. It speaks to youth in a language they understand. Sport can create hope where once there was only despair. It is more powerful than government in breaking down racial barriers. It laughs in the face of all kinds of discrimination." - the late, great Nelson Mandela, who died this week, speaking back in 2000 with his customary eloquence about how sport, for all its frivolities, ultimately enriches the world in ways that nothing else can match.