The days of Fernando Torres cracking the backs of nets and beating defenders are long gone.
But at least he can console himself with the knowledge that he's a whizz at cracking eggs and beating cake mix.
That appears to be the message sent out by the star's appearance in an advert for Chelsea's shirt sponsor broadcast in Thailand.
The point of the commercial is apparently that you can keep the eggs in the fridge they manufacture prior to using them in cupcakes; though obviously many people claim that eggs are best not kept in the fridge at all, but simply bought regularly and used promptly while still fresh.
And in case you were wondering: yes, this is sports journalism at its finest. World of Sport confidently expects a phone call from the Pulitzer Prize committee at any moment.